There is a solution to the housing crisis – peg British house prices to the cost of a… https://goo.gl/fb/BR8Nsn
Of course the US should ban Syrians – remember how all the Jews fleeing Germany were a bit… https://goo.gl/fb/8oYWIJ
Typical Europeans coming over here to steal the benefits of owning our railways https://goo.gl/fb/FMt6iJ
I've enjoyed the Southern Rail strike – it's turned Brighton station into Casablanca https://goo.gl/fb/Or0FMz
I feel like the establishment has really been given a kicking when I see Farage celebrating… https://goo.gl/fb/JEm8Z9
If Hillary Clinton could just admit she's a terrible candidate, people might vote for her… https://goo.gl/fb/BzJ2Wo
Who could have guessed that Donald Trump could be sexist and uncouth in his fifties? We all… http://goo.gl/fb/f6EnNn
The Labour plotters are right: it's definitely Jeremy Corbyn who needs to 'learn lessons… http://goo.gl/fb/0EtfRt
If Labour members are being banned for supporting other parties, then Labour MPs should be… http://goo.gl/fb/E0tZF6
Now we're doing well in the dressage, it's taking off in the council estates of Britain. You can barely move in Croydon for dancing horses.
Tonight I shall do my show, while putting out of my mind that Andy Murray is on an Olympic final. The show won't last 3 minutes. I promise.
Is shirt-pulling allowed in the Heptathlon 800 metres? What do they consider a fair challenge?
OY! IF YOU'VE FALLEN ASLEEP ON THE SETTEE, WAKE UP! NOW!
I've got a column on a colourful page in the Daily Mirror today, here's a bit on my old mate the Duke of Westminster http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/new-duke-westminsters-overnight-billions-8618584
This is my column on the Labour Party, if you've time for it between shooting grouse http://www.independent.co.uk/voices/labour-jeremy-corbyn-ban-members-from-voting-high-court-can-t-be-trusted-economy-a7184971.html
Here's my tip if you're in Edinburgh, have a look at Phil Ellis, perfectly shambolically brilliant with an end different from any other ever
It's not Paul Nuttall's fault he made a mistake about Hillsborough – he can't be held… https://goo.gl/fb/3btC7y
Thank God we have a Prime Minister prepared to face down anyone over Brexit – even those… https://goo.gl/fb/GFKLIc
It's time to stop politicising celebrity deaths such as George Michael and Fidel Castro https://goo.gl/fb/tpUe4u
A Devon village has unleashed its anger toward the recent 70 Syrian arrivals by donating £… https://goo.gl/fb/65mzw6
History tells us that Donald Trump's genius idea to make a database of Muslims will… https://goo.gl/fb/HbKX2T
Of course Toby Young understands what life is like on benefits – he knows what 'rings true' https://goo.gl/fb/YJUo80
Iraq is invaded... and the first casualty of war is truth http://goo.gl/fb/zC3oap
The Labour leadership battle between Jeremy Corbyn and his critics will soon be over – for… http://goo.gl/fb/gvGEit
At last Nigel Farage has emerged to defend the ordinary billionaires of the world, like… http://goo.gl/fb/oQNDKY
I was with @billybragg as he made his comment about Corbyn, clearly in support. Who'd guess a Murdoch paper might twist the truth like that?
Where is he on a list of all-time sport stars? He can only be behind Ali in the last 50 years, that boy Bolt.
I'm about to be a judge on the Radio 4 new comedy awards. I demand to know what fool in the BBC thought I'm responsible enough for that.
Go on Greg, land in the crowd.
I'm worried if I nip out for a slash I might miss Greg or Jessica. Probably best to go on the floor.
The new Duke of Westminster's overnight billions show how little Britain has changed http://goo.gl/fb/AWDvOB
From Edinburgh Festival, my column on the great show that is the Labour Party "A riotous mess ****" Evening News http://www.independent.co.uk/voices/labour-jeremy-corbyn-ban-members-from-voting-high-court-can-t-be-trusted-economy-a7184971.html
Commuters are delighted the Southern Rail strike is over, as now their trains can go back to all being cancelled for the normal reasons.
The House of Lords should block Brexit to remind Britain that the 'will of the people' is… https://goo.gl/fb/0Fw67Q
I'm glad well known fact-checker Donald Trump has come out against 'fake news' https://goo.gl/fb/Dq62wQ
Thank God Nigel Farage has the courage to take a stand against whining do-gooder Brendan Cox https://goo.gl/fb/N2zY0k
Thank God Theresa May is finally standing up for Christmas – thanks to political… https://goo.gl/fb/2AfO3a
Since politicians try to copy victors expect Labour's Trump inspired sexual harassment… https://goo.gl/fb/WLMBCI
Of course refugee children should face dental tests – we need to make sure we're getting… https://goo.gl/fb/fN3MF9
Thank God Theresa May is continuing the historic Tory tradition of fighting the elite http://goo.gl/fb/nd6Ofc
I feel sorry for Concentrix – sometimes it's necessary to be so tough on benefits that you… http://goo.gl/fb/XJiOF2
Thanks to the internet, there are now millions of cyber Rupert Murdochs http://goo.gl/fb/2co1ju
It's my one Edinburgh night off, I feel I should use it fully by going into space or deep sea diving. Or have a pint and watch the Olympics.
His achievements now surpass those of Einstein, and challenge those of Batman.
These women are so joyous and friendly with their opponents after a competition. They remind me very much of the Premier League.
What a boy.
Murray in another Olympic final. I reckon he could nip across town and get a silver in the dressage.
Tonight, at my show in Edinburgh, in support of Labour values, I'll ban anyone who's bought a ticket from coming in, the dirty extremists.
Labour is using members' money to ban them from voting – and it says it can be trusted on… http://goo.gl/fb/BnYhXf